Would you be able to beat a monkey with a stick? I mean really beat it. Hit it more than once, repeatedly in fact. Disable it. More than one monkey too. A handful. A gang. An army of monkeys? These were the questions I had been...
Category - India
So, here I am in Sri Lanka, in Colombo, sat in the bursting corridor of light that is the Katunayake International Airport, a veritable Hadron Collider minus the God particle. I have six more hours until I fly back to London...
Bus journey A holy man carrying a plate of offerings and what can only be described as religious paraphernalia pushes onto the overcrowded mountain bus. He winds his way through the bodies until he faces me. He then hits me on...
India is like having an American girlfriend, one of those blonde, fake-breasted high school cheerleading stereotypes, who happens to have the unfortunate habit of turning into a 48-year-old alcoholic drug-user at any moment when...
The majority of men in India between the ages of 10 and 40 wear some seriously funky threads: a skinny, dusty appropriation of seventies glam rock chic, future flouros, and faded retro paisley. Big-collared patterned shirts...
After endless fickle cycles of eating and sickness in India, I finally arrived at the point where curries, thalis, street snacks, dosas, paranthas, and chai all felt right in my belly. I had reached a state of nirvana. There was...
In the former Raj hill station of Shimla, where sweaty beetroot-cheeked Brits once flocked to escape the blistering heat of the plains, there exists an absolute gem of a coffee house. And not one of those fancy identi-kit modern...
Forget about licking the rainbow trunk of some rare tropical frog and wandering goggle-eyed around the Amazon. Don’t waste your time picking magic mushrooms from the turds of Finnish reindeers so you can spend days rolling...
I refuse to pay £12 a night for a room in India. It sounds ridiculous but it would be nearly twice the highest amount I’ve paid since arriving and I am a tight-arse. I am fully aware that at £12, the room I am in is by...
I am in an episode of Scooby Doo. It is evening. I am stood knee-deep in undergrowth, peering through chained railings. The gates that block my way are covered with rusty Keep Out signs. I am looking for a creepy gatekeeper to...